Medical Jokes

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Medical Jokes (Teacher: Michael)

A goes to the doctor and , "Doc, I to live very . What I ?"
"I that is a wise decision," the doctor replies. "Let's , you smoke?"
"Oh.. Half a pack a day."
"Starting NOW, no more smoking."
The agrees.
The doctor then asks, " you drink?"
"Oh, Doc, not much, just a bit of wine with my meals, and a beer or two every once in a ."
"Starting now, you drink only . No exceptions."
The is a bit upset, but also agrees.
The doctor asks, "How you eat?"
"Oh, , you , Doc, normal stuff."
"Starting now you on a very strict diet: you to eat only raw vegetables, with no dressing, and non-fat cottage cheese."
The is now really worried.
"Doc, is all this really necessary?"
" you to live ?"
"Yes."
"Absolutely necessary. And of breaking the diet.
"The is quite restless, but the doctor continues,
" you sex?"
"Yeah, once a week or so..., only with my wife!" he adds hurriedly.
"As soon as you of here you to buy twin beds. No more sex for you.
None." The is appalled. "Doc... you sure to live longer this way?"
"I no idea, but whatever you live, I assure you is to an eternity!"

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